EvilJohn.net

After the storms hit Wednesday night, the neighbor’s fence decided it didn’t want to be a fence anymore. It decided it wanted to be a kite, a career I might add, that didn’t get off the ground.  Fortunately, my car was there to catch it before the untethered fence piece crashed into something important, like the ground.  Tragically, I find myself without a car for the next few days. On the upside I got to meet our neighbor, Terri. She and her husband (Sir Not-Appearing-in-this-Blog) have a two year old girl whom, I have not bothered to meet.

Right neighborly, I know.

So after a 15 foot segment of ethnocentric (I’m assuming it hit my car because it was an American fence, another tragic case of American Fence on Japanese Car crime), landed on my car, I had to goto the dentist again. This is like trip number 5 this year. I’ve been neglecting my teeth (something I will never, EVER do again), and I’m nearly done with visits this year. After getting my front teeth drilled and filled, my dentist decided to try one his new toys, a FRICKIN’ LASER BEAM, on my gums. The tissue is very red, and not healing as well as it should.

His answer? BURN IT OFF BABY. So yeah, he fires up the laser and trims two millimeters of gum off my teeth. It was sort of uncomfortable, but my teeth look longer, which makes you look younger! Apparently 10.5 mm of exposed tooth is normal, and I only had 8 mm. My gums were to long in front. As he vaporized the flesh on some of my teeth that were not totally numb, I could actually feel the laser remove the tissue. Weird feeling. Have you ever had very dry skin on your hands, and put some lotion or water on them and your skins just seems to feel bigger? It felt like that. Also, it smelled like barbecue pork. I got hungry.

I’m hoping the two events are unrelated.